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+--- Thread: Song for Chris (/showthread.php?tid=13)
Song for Chris - EyeScream - 05-01-2009
What makes me more pathetic:
Writing this in the first place, or posting it online?
"Chris," by the way, is not anyone related to this forum (or maybe he followed me here; hell, I don't know), so if your name happens to be chris I apologize for the confusion. : )
----------------------------------------------------
Black Thread
I still wear your tattoo on my arm
A black and blue and bloody charm
That doesn't fade
And the name on the blade
Is always the same
It has your name
You wear my heart around your neck (that's the chorus)
When I met you I had no heart
So you gave me one, and you took it apart
Now my heartsrings are frayed
And the song that they play
Is always the same
It has your name
(chorus)
The drugs won't get you out of my head
Maybe I'll try this gun instead
'Cause I'm losing my mind
And the ties that bind
Are still the same
They spell your name
(chorus)
I'm in love, I'm in hell
I'm so glad you're doing well
With all that I gave,
And the stone on my grave
Will say the same--
It will have your name
---------------------------------------
Either it rocks or it sucks;
Either way I'd like to hear why. : )
Re: Song for Chris - JenniLynne - 05-02-2009
(05-01-2009, 11:40 PM)EyeScream link Wrote: What makes me more pathetic:
Writing this in the first place, or posting it online?
\"Chris,\" by the way, is not anyone related to this forum (or maybe he followed me here; hell, I don't know), so if your name happens to be chris I apologize for the confusion. : )
----------------------------------------------------
Black Thread
I still wear your tattoo on my arm
A black and blue and bloody charm
That doesn't fade
And the name on the blade
Is always the same
It has your name
You wear my heart around your neck (that's the chorus)
When I met you I had no heart
So you gave me one, and you took it apart
Now my heartsrings are frayed
And the song that they play
Is always the same
It has your name
(chorus)
The drugs won't get you out of my head
Maybe I'll try this gun instead
'Cause I'm losing my mind
And the ties that bind
Are still the same
They spell your name
(chorus)
I'm in love, I'm in hell
I'm so glad you're doing well
With all that I gave,
And the stone on my grave
Will say the same--
It will have your name
---------------------------------------
Either it rocks or it sucks;
Either way I'd like to hear why. : )
I liked it a lot..... It's very creative..... Thank you for sharing it.....
Peace & :ht:,
Jenni
Re: Song for Chris - Ezrasleo - 05-08-2009
Neither makes you 'pathetic' !
Don't EVER think putting your feelings on paper is a mistake. It is a very healthy way of expressing ourselves, particularly when we find it so hard to articulate our inner suffering to others verbally.
I also think those that post their creativity online/in this forum are quite courageous. They are often borne of very private struggles, and stripped of the superficial. It takes a lot of guts to put ourselves out there like this.
I really like the composition and rhythm. Each stanza is like a smaller circle that comes back onto itself, and at the same time flowing into the next - all within the larger whole, as it itself comes full circle. I found it dark and calming at the same time - like a river at night... you can't see it, but you can hear it.
Whether you choose to post any more or your work - and I hope you do - please don't stop writing. It can only help you.
Take care, :H2:
Ez
Re: Song for Chris - Sadstguy - 05-16-2009
I was thinking of a reply, and then saw that Ez provided it far more eloquently than I could have done.
True talent. Thank you sharing--Thank you for the honor of experiencing it.